Introduction

From the moment we turn 13, officially beginning our teenage years, we enter a world that feels so serious all of a sudden. Seventh grade is when we officially become teenagers. When transitioning to high school, our seventh grade report cards and test scores are what schools use to reference our capabilities, which makes things feel especially tense and overwhelming. This explains the pressure that society often puts on teens, regarding where they might end up or what their future holds for them. It doesn’t stop at the anticipation of high school. This cycle of managing a life different from your pre-teen years and childhood is a constant struggle for so many teenagers.

Juggling academics, social life, family, and personal time can be challenging and it's not something to be overlooked. The first year of high school (ages 14 & 15), we’re thrown into a new environment that takes time to adjust to new crowds of people and the sudden change of pace: more classes, more opportunities for self management, finding the right people to surround ourselves with, etc. Sophomore year comes around (ages 15 & 16) and independence feels so far away. We’ve been in high school for at least a year now so maybe it feels like we’ve got the hang of things. Even if that were to be true, the end still seems like a lifetime away. By the time Junior year rolls around, (ages 16 & 17) we’re presented with a whole new bracket of obstacles: SATS, ACTS, college prep, etc. This is a stressful thing in itself because it can feel like life revolves around preparing for the next stages of our lives.

All this to say, there's a reason why the teenage years are one of the most crucial and overwhelming times of your life. And it's important to have the right resources and information to help get through this period as best as you can. In this blog post, I’ll share some of the resources that can help teens manage these stressors.

What to Expect from Therapy

Therapy can offer a variety of help depending on who you are and what you need. As teenagers, we’re still developing skills that will guide us through the rest of life. Any challenges, obstacles, or future events in general that come our way, will be easier to navigate through with therapy.

Therapy is a great place to build and work through skills like:

Self-confidence
Goal setting
Relationship building
Problem solving
Self-awareness
Motivation
Communication skills
Boundary setting
Managing school and life stress

Therapy is a judgment free zone where therapists are on your team and there to help. While some people think therapy is only a place to go when in crisis, there are actually a lot of reasons people seek support. Sometimes people want help with improving relationships, stress management, or making life transitions easier. It is also a place you can go to work through personal thoughts, feelings, emotions, etc. which could potentially prevent possible future crises. Additionally, therapy can be valuable for self-discovery, personal growth, and maintaining your mental and emotional well-being.

The way we call our friends to rant or to talk, is the way a therapist is there for us. Sometimes, we may not completely understand the meaning of our feelings, we just want to get everything out there. The therapist can help better understand and maneuver through those feelings while also offering techniques on how to cope with or handle confusing situations. These are just some examples of how therapy can provide a supportive, non-judgmental space to express and explore your thoughts. Through that, your therapist can help you gain insight into certain behaviors and from there, you can work together to develop coping skills for those behaviors. It is important to recognize that therapy is not anything negative, it is just a personal tool!

Where to Find Therapy

The most common ways for teens to find referrals or connections to therapists are:

talking to a school counselor,
asking their pediatrician or primary care doctor,
search engines like Google, or
websites like PsychologyToday.com where you can search using a variety of filters based on their needs.

The key aspects of finding therapy are recognition and self advocacy. We as teenagers, as hard as it may be, need to recognize that we’re struggling or need guidance with something in order to find opportunities to receive help. The next step is being an advocate for ourselves and voicing what we need (whether that’s researching resources, making the call, or asking for help). It is also important to remember that for therapy to be productive, it depends heavily on your fit with your therapist: it is really helpful to find someone who you feel is relatable, reliable, a good personality match, and accessible. Some people give up on therapy because the therapist isn't the right fit for them or due to a bad first experience but persistence in finding the right therapist for you could make all the difference and end up being really beneficial. Feeling secure with your therapist will make it easier to open up and fully benefit from sessions.

Note: There are links to mental health resources for teens at the end of this post.

Is Therapy Right for Me?

This is an extremely broad question because therapy is for everyone and anyone. While not everyone might need therapy, it is important to have some form of mental health support. That support could come in the form of family, professionals, peer/social, etc. The important part is figuring out which method is best for you. The easiest way to find out? Try different things out and see what feels best!

With that being said, some ways to tell if you could benefit from therapy are usually if you find yourself:

Avoiding social environments/interactions
Declining in your academic/professional performance
Showing symptoms of Anxiety, Depression, PTSD, etc.
Having difficulty sleeping
Thinking of hurting yourself or others

If you are feeling any or a combination of the above, consider therapy, as it could be a beneficial outlet for you.

Helping a Friend in Need

As teenagers, it is not uncommon for friends to talk about problems in their lives most with their peers. Keeping a mental note of key indicators that what your friend is telling you is bigger, or goes deeper than just a friendly rant, can be helpful. Try lookout for the same symptoms listed in the previous section, as well as more that you as a friend would be able to notice.

Examples of these kinds of symptoms: extreme or sudden changes in mood or behavior, difficult life situation/problem, prolonged sadness, lack of appetite, sudden increase or unusual amount of substance use, verbalization of suicidal thoughts, etc. Keep an eye out for if these behaviors become habitual. In that case, if you feel comfortable, try to talk to your friend and suggest the idea of therapy. Be sure to ask them of their thoughts as it is ultimately their decision! If you are not comfortable enough to do that or are unsure of how to proceed, it is important to express your concerns to a trusted adult.

* Important note: Setting boundaries is crucial to helping friends in need. Make sure you’re taking care of your own mental health in the process of doing what you can for friends. Sometimes, the best way to help is referring them to a professional so they can be cared for and get the proper attention.

4 Need-to-Know Aspects of Therapy

Parent involvement - There are certain legal components to keep in mind as a teenager seeking therapy. While your legal guardians do have to eventually be notified that you are actively attending therapy, you are able to have a certain amount of therapy sessions before your therapist is obligated to notify your parents/guardians. For adolescents ages 12-16, you are able to access up to 8 (90 min) sessions. After that, if your therapists believe the best course of action is to keep parents/guardians uninvolved, for your benefit, sessions can continue without parental knowledge.
Family support - If you are worried about their reaction, or don’t know how to go about bringing it up, that is something you can talk about or work on in your sessions with your therapist’s support. Your parents can be included in some sessions and should know about you attending therapy but ultimately, you have the ability to give your family as much or as little information as you’d like. Remember that your therapist is an advocate for you, and supports you advocating for yourself.
Confidentiality - Everything that is said in your session stays between you and your therapist, which means parents/guardians don't have access to your files without your consent. This is to ensure that sessions are as productive as possible. Therapy is only effective if you are open minded to the process, meaning you get out of it what you put in. So, if you aren’t able to engage in treatment out of fear that parents/guardians would be notified about the activity of your sessions, it wouldn't benefit you in any way.
Payment - People pay for therapy sessions in a variety of ways depending on the circumstances. Health insurance, money out of pocket, and cards designated specifically for mental health are some common forms of payment.
As a teenager, 3 ways you can access therapy without paying full fee are:
- Utilizing services offered in school - whether that be high school or college, you can visit a school counselor or a counseling center where you can find resources to get further support for your mental health.
- Sliding fee scale - this is another option that's common for adults to use which means the existing price is altered to accommodate your financial needs.
- Free services - although free counseling can be hard to find, it is not impossible. Doing research and making calls to find therapy that is financially convenient will help you greatly in the long run.

Conclusion

Although we are still teenagers, we are able to have a lot of independence when it comes to finding help for our mental health. There are professionals waiting to help us, and it is up to us to use our resources and advocate for ourselves. Check out the resources provided below to continue on the journey of care for your mental health. Reading this and starting your research are the first steps of the process!